Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Lies mother-in-laws tell

Our next submission is from an anonymous user:

My mother in law lies about my to everyone. She tells others that the reason her son isn't at any family functions is because i feel my family is superior and more important when in fact she just drives him crazy. She is mean and rude. She was going to not even come to my bridal shower and told my matron of honor and my mother that they were not to include any of her family members because no one would be attending. Luckily, my finacé laid down the law and she attended, but made snide comments the entire time and refused to talk to anyone, including me.

She has told me in the past that I do not belong and I am not apart of the family. That I look down on her and her family when I have made every effort to include them in the wedding. She is embarassing my fiancé and he feels terrible that she is so cruel. No one can curb her out of control behavior, and we've all tried. What the heck do I do now? Is it going to be like this for the rest of our lives?? I can't stand this!!
Has your fiancé told his mother to curb her behavior? As much as it drives you crazy, it is very hard for you to say anything that will make a difference. Your future husband must be the one to tell her that her behavior is unacceptable. He may even need to go so far as to tell her that he won't visit or see her if she continues this way.

And he needs to make it clear that he's doing the talking, not you. If she feels that he was "put up to" it, then it will only make her more angry & give her fuel for her rantings. She needs to understand that her snide comments & rude behavior are unacceptable. You are going to be part of his family and his mother needs to accept it. If she doesn't, then she has to accept the consequences of her actions.

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5 Comments:

Blogger Miche said...

Thanks for your sweet post on my blog! My MIL is actually feeling tons better and might get to leave the hospital Friday-I am so thankful and excited for her to be home and well!

Also, this is quite the serious blog here-and how very wonderful for you to help with what can be a touchy subject. In laws certainly can be hard, and I am sad that it is my husband that has the hard end of the stick. His parents are so amazing I sometimes claim them as my own :) lol

Take care!

3/18/10, 11:11 AM  
Blogger becky s said...

Oh yay - I am so glad to hear that your MIL is feeling better. What a great relief for you!

My former MIL was a bit of, um, a pain & this blog was inspired by that & a convo w/some friends. Sometimes we just need to vent to someone & that's really the reason I started it. Haven't really publicized it that much, so we don't get a lot of submissions. That's okay, though. I just put them up when people find it. :)

3/18/10, 11:45 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

my mother-in-law has fake breasts, they are bigger than her body. she's also has mental problem, such as yelling at people, get angry and upset if no one pays attention to her. Worst of all, she hates cooking, but she loves to go to other people's house for free meals.
I can't believe I have to deal with her.

4/19/10, 5:48 PM  
Blogger Exhausted said...

I feel for you! Im just as lost as what to do with my clingy mother in law. (Im trash in her eyes) My problem is, my husbands father left him the house. SHE LIVES IN THE FLAT AT THE BACK! 3 meters away from my back door. Im living in hell! If your husband doesnt put his foot down in your defense, get a restraining order. Tell her you are a family now and she must know her boundries.

7/21/11, 5:05 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This sounds just like my mil. She would not attend 2 of her 4 sons weddings because she did not approve of them. She is so jelous of all her sons spouses. She hates me and lies to everyone in her family about me. I used to do everything for her. She is rude and doesnt appreciate anything anyone does. I will never get rid of her. She has been "so sick for the last 10 years". Give me a break, she is in better health than any of her sons.

10/14/11, 8:40 PM  

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